The Red Stapler Chronicles

Recently at work, I had a conversation with an upset customer concerning the changes made to his credit card account.   Currently, the customer’s card is separated two accounts, one that charges a 21% interest rate and another that is interest free as long as he makes his monthly $40 payment.  What the customer wanted to do was completely pay off his non-interest bearing account.

Normally, this would not have been a problem, and the customer’s request would have been easily fulfilled.  However, thanks to the 2009 Credit Act that went into effect on February 22nd, it is now illegal for my company to allow him to do so. This act is designed to protect consumers from unsavory credit card company policies that would apply payments to the accounts with the lowest interest, resulting in more profit for them and more financing charges for the consumer.

Getting back to my story, you may be wondering why someone would want to pay off the account that charged no interest first.   In this particular case, the customer explained that he just wanted to have one account, wanted a “de-cluttered and less confusing statement”, and just wanted to be rid off the extra account.   Although I tried to explain the new law and why he would be better off applying the extra payment to his account that was enduring 21% interest, he left frustrated and unhappy.

Now, I do not think that this customer was just crazy or naive of financial matters. In fact, he is actually a  successful account executive for a Fortune 500 company.  Instead, I think he was just making his decision based on a idea stuck in his head rather than a financial reason.   This situation made me wonder if I make some of my own financial decisions the same way.   Unfortunately for me, after doing some analysis I found that I am guilty of doing the exact same thing.  The following are some the the things that I do with my money that really make no financial sense.

1. Insisting on keeping a set amount in my checking account at all times. I am not sure how I came up with this arbitrary amount other than it is a nice round number.  This amount covers my monthly expenses about 5 times over.  There is absolutely no logical reason why I never let my balance fall below this amount.  If I were thinking with my financial side of my brain, I would  cut the amount in half and put the rest in my ING account and earn some extra interest.  Even though I know this is the right thing to do,  I can’t seem to overcome my mental block.

2. Overpaying my taxes all year so that I get a nice refund. Surely, this is a very common practice.  Millions of Americans use this method because they think they would just spend the extra money in each paycheck and use the tax refund for a major purchase or vacation.   But of course, this makes no financial sense.  Basically you are allowing the government to make interest on your money all year just because you don’t think you have the discipline to save it yourself.

3. Ignoring my long term debt. I do this with my student loan.   I could easily pay it off completely, but just do not want to see the money leave my checking account (see #1).  So instead, I incur the 3% interest rate and waste $350 a year on interest.  There is a part of the brain that just keeps on telling me that this type of long term debt does not count and that I should just continue making my payments and settle it in 16 years.  Many people do this with their mortgage.  Paying extra on your mortgage can help pay it off years in advance.  Still, this usually proves to be much easier said than done.

4. Taking part in the Sunshine Club. What is the Sunshine Club you ask?  The Sunshine Club is my workplace’s weekly lottery program.   Each member puts in $5 a week and we take turns buying the tickets, dreaming of winning millions.   Even though it is fun thinking that we have a chance to win and quit our jobs, the odds are unbelievably against us winning the jackpot.  Still, we throw away over $250 a year in pursuit of this improbable dream.

Although I do consider myself to be knowledgeable about personal finance (after all I occasionally even write about it), it is alarming that I still do the above things that are not financially logical.  I guess to seek some professional help.

So move over Dave Ramsey and Suzie Orman, I will be turning to Dr. Phil from now on for all my financial advice

This post was recently featured in the 246th Carnival of Personal Finance at Taking Charge
a CreditCards.com  blog.

Share on Facebook

Here is how it will work–Just leave a comment on this post with your selection for each category. In addition, as a tiebreaker, predict how long the Oscars will last in Hours and Minutes.

It will be the responsibility of each blogger that enters to congratulate the winner on their blog, providing a small blurb about the winning blog and a link to it. As a result, the winning blogger will be rewarded with some great links and some extra traffic–surely a valuable prize for any blogger.   It’s just that simple.

Let’s have some fun with this!! Be sure to spread the word to all your blogging friends.

1. Best picture Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“The Blind Side”
“District 9”
“An Education”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”
“A Serious Man”
“Up”
“Up in the Air”

2. Best Actor Oscar Nominees

Jeff Bridges in “Crazy Heart”
George Clooney in “Up in the Air”
Colin Firth in “A Single Man”
Morgan Freeman in “Invictus”
Jeremy Renner in “The Hurt Locker”

3. Best Supporting Actor Oscar Nominees

Matt Damon in “Invictus”
Woody Harrelson in “The Messenger”
Christopher Plummer in “The Last Station”
Stanley Tucci in “The Lovely Bones”
Christoph Waltz in “Inglourious Basterds”

4. Best Actress Oscar Nominees

Sandra Bullock in “The Blind Side”
Helen Mirren in “The Last Station”
Carey Mulligan in “An Education”
Gabourey Sidibe in “Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”
Meryl Streep in “Julie & Julia”

5. Best Supporting Actress Oscar Nominees

Penélope Cruz in “Nine”
Vera Farmiga in “Up in the Air”
Maggie Gyllenhaal in “Crazy Heart”
Anna Kendrick in “Up in the Air”
Mo’Nique in “Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”

6. Best Animated Film Oscar Nominees

“Coraline”
“Fantastic Mr. Fox”
“The Princess and the Frog”
“The Secret of Kells”
“Up”

7. Best Art Direction Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus”
“Nine”
“Sherlock Holmes”
“The Young Victoria”

8. Best Cinematography Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“The White Ribbon”

9. Best Costume Design Oscar Nominees

“Bright Star”
“Coco before Chanel”
“The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus”
“Nine”
“The Young Victoria”

10. Best Director Oscar Nominees

“Avatar” - James Cameron
“The Hurt Locker” - Kathryn Bigelow
“Inglourious Basterds” - Quentin Tarantino
“Precious” - Lee Daniels
“Up in the Air” - Jason Reitman

11. Best Documentary Feature Oscar Nominees

“Burma VJ”
“The Cove”
“Food, Inc.”
“The Most Dangerous Man in America: Daniel Ellsberg and the Pentagon Papers”
“Which Way Home”

12. Best Documentary Short Subject Oscar Nominees

“China’s Unnatural Disaster: The Tears of Sichuan, Province”
“The Last Campaign of Governor Booth Gardner”
“The Last Truck: Closing of a GM Plant”
“Music by Prudence”
“Rabbit à la Berlin”

13. Best Editing Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“District 9”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“Precious”

14. Best Foreign Film Oscar Nominees

“Ajami” Israel
“El Secreto de Sus Ojos” Argentina
“The Milk of Sorrow” Peru
“Un Prophète” France
“The White Ribbon” Germany

15. Best Makeup Oscar Nominees

“Il Divo”
“Star Trek”
“The Young Victoria”

16. Best Original Score Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“Fantastic Mr. Fox”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Sherlock Holmes”
“Up”

17. Best Original Song Oscar Nominees

“Almost There” from “The Princess and the Frog”
“Down in New Orleans” from “The Princess and the Frog”
“Loin de Paname” from “Paris 36”
“Take It All” from “Nine”
“The Weary Kind (Theme from Crazy Heart)” from “Crazy Heart”

18. Best Animated Short Film Oscar Nominees

“French Roast”
“Granny O’Grimm’s Sleeping Beauty”
“The Lady and the Reaper (La Dama y la Muerte)”
“Logorama”
“A Matter of Loaf and Death”

19. Best Short Live Action Oscar Nominees

“The Door”
“Instead of Abracadabra”
“Kavi”
“Miracle Fish”
“The New Tenants”

20. Best Sound Editing Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“Star Trek”
“Up”

21. Best Sound Mixing Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“Star Trek”
“Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen”

22. Best Visual Effects Oscar Nominees

“Avatar”
“District 9”
“Star Trek”

23. Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar Nominees

“District 9”
“An Education”
“In the Loop”
“Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”
“Up in the Air”

24. Best Original Screenplay Oscar Nominees

“The Hurt Locker”
“Inglourious Basterds”
“The Messenger”
“A Serious Man”
“Up”

Really want to support this contest?  Just add the following contest logo to your blog by cutting and pasting the code.

<a href=”http://www.redstaplerchronicles.com/first-annual-bloggers-oscar-contest” mce_href=”http://www.redstaplerchronicles.com/first-annual-bloggers-oscar-contest”<img src=”http://www.redstaplerchronicles.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/oscars.jpg” mce_src=”http://www.redstaplerchronicles.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/oscars.jpg”

Share on Facebook

Every year, millions of Americans gather in front of their televisions to watch the Super Bowl.  In fact, last year an estimated 98 million viewers watched the Pittsburgh Steelers defeat the Arizona Cardinals in thrilling fashion.

Even non-football fans tend to watch the Superbowl for various reasons.  Some watch for the half time show.  Others might watch it just because they are at one of the countless Super Bowl parties that will occur and want to keep up with the conversations.   But the number one reason why a non football fan watches the Super Bowl is clearly the commercials!

Advertisers pay up to $3 million dollars per thirty seconds to get their ad on during the Super Bowl.  Even in this tough economy, there will be some ads that just don’t make the cut.  This year, The Red Stapler Chronicles is proud to share with you the story boards of the top ten rejected Super Bowl commercials.

Share on Facebook

Have you ever watched a movie in which all the problems are resolved, all those loose ends seem to be neatly tied up, and the main characters live happily ever after?  Of course you have.  Most Hollywood movies end with such a joyful ending that allows movie goers to leave the theater with a smile.

Unfortunately, as we all know, life does not always produce happy endings.  As a result, I think it is time to take a second look at some of Hollywood’s more famous movies and reveal what their true endings might be like.

Forrest Gump

How it ended–Forrest puts his son on the school bus and patiently waits on a tree stump for him to come back every day.  We are led to believe that Forrest will raise his child, even though Junior is already his academically superior.

A more realistic ending–Forrest is able to raise his child without his incident for about 6 months.  After young Forrest gets sick, because he served him expired shrimp for breakfast, school officials contact the Greenbow, Alabama child protection services.  They take young Forrest away, only to give him back 3 weeks later.  Rumors say that Lt. Dan helped Forrest give the agency a substantial bribe.  Years later, Forrest becomes the first victim of Bernie Madoff, who scammed him out of all his Bubba Gump and Apple fortunes.

Wizard of Oz

How it ended–Dorothy “wakes up” back in Kansas where she is surrounded by her family and friendly farmhands.  She now knows that there is no place like home.

A more realistic ending–Although Dorothy does appreciate everything she has for a little while, she quickly falls back into her bratty ways, complaining about everything, and dreaming about escaping the Kansas farm life.  After Elmira Gulch successfully lobbies to get Toto euthanized, Dorothy falls into a deep depression and starts abusing pain killers.  Later in life, for some unknown reason, Dorothy develops a fetish for “little people” that leads her to one destructive relationship to another.

Big

How it ended–Josh Baskin found the magical Zoltar machine that granted his wish to become big, and wishes that he return to being a kid.  He returns home to his family after a 2 month stint living in the city as an adult.

A more realistic ending–After the initial euphoria of being reunited with his family, authorities demand answers from Josh.  Where was he?  What did the kidnapper look like?  How did he escape?  Since Josh was not able to provide a plausible, consistent story, his mom concluded that he has a mental disorder.  Josh now is a patient at the Abe Frohman Psychological Hospital, where he has resided for the last 22 years.

Top Gun

How it ended–Despite being outnumbered, Maverick is able to exercise is guilt of losing Goose and defeat the enemy MiGs using his superior dog fighting skills.  He becomes a Top Gun instructor and lives happily ever after with Charlie.

A more realistic ending–As soon as she turns 32, Maverick dumps Charlie and starts dating a 21 year old Hooters waitress.  Maverick eventually gets kicked out of the Navy after an accident in which his wing grazed the air traffic control tower.  Two naval officers were burned in the ensuing fire and the air boss actually died due to a heart attack.  Maverick is now a part time singer at a local San Diego bar.

Dirty Dancing

How it ended–Johnny crashes the final dance performance at Kellerman’s and emancipates Baby from the corner.  The two perform a dance number and Baby’s dad apologizes to Johnny for believing that he knocked up Penny.  There are now no remaining obstacles preventing Johnny and Baby from being together.

A more realistic ending–By the next summer, Baby is pregnant and Johnny has left her alone to go on a dancing tour.  Keellerman’s has gone belly up because of a series of lawsuits  alleging sexual misconduct.  Baby’s sister Lisa, was recently kicked out of an American Idol audition after being rejected for the seventh straight year.

Rain Man

How it ended–Charlie Babbitt sends his brother Raymond back to Wallbrook on a train.  Even though Charlie has given up on his custody battle for Raymond, he promises to be a frequent visitor.

A more realistic ending–Once Charlie gets into financial trouble again, he abducts Raymond again and they go on another Vegas adventure.  However, casino security recognizes the pair and apprehends Charlie for a beat down session in a basement room.  Raymond, all alone in Vegas, ends up being busted by cops for solicitation a 52 year old prostitute wearing a shinny dress.

Armageddon

How it ended–The group of oil drillers are able to save the world by drilling 800 feet into a deadly rogue asteroid.  Rockhound is met on the NASA runway by a very appreciative Molly Mounds while Chick is greeted by his ex-wife and son.  Soon after, A.J. and Grace get married in front of all their friends.

A more realistic ending–Once Chic’s ex-wife is able to siphon away most of his reward money, she leaves him again and re-applies for a restraining order.  Molly Mounds leaves Rockhound after he pays back Vinnie the loan shark at 60% and runs out of money.  A.J. goes bankrupt after being sued by a rig worker who lost his left arm due to his recklessness.

Office Space

How it ended–Peter ends up working in construction, cleaning up a burnt down Initech.  Milton takes the travelers checks to a island resort where he is unhappy with the service.  Michael and Samir find jobs at Intertrode.

A more realistic ending–Obviously, in real life, even a fire would not prevent the authorities from figuring out that a significant amount of money was missing.  Peter is able to plant some evidence at the fire site that implicates Lumbergh and he ends up spending 8 years in a “pound me in the ass” prison.  Milton also get into trouble with the law for going postal on a hotel worker who made him change rooms.  Lastly, on a more positive note, Samir and Michael invent a better version of Twitter and make millions.

Share on Facebook